Girl Please! No Wonder You're Single9/08/2010
You have a Bachelor and possibly a Masters degree. You pay your own bills. You keep your hair and n...
You have a Bachelor and possibly a Masters degree. You pay your own bills. You keep your hair and nails. You always stay fly. You do not have any kids. You stay drama and disease free. You possibly own your own home. You are an independent woman.
So am I and so are almost all the females I know. But yet you wonder why you are single? None of these qualities warrants you a good man. If all you have to offer is the list above you are no different from me and I am no different from you.
I see more and more of us ‘educated’, ‘independent’, “I got my own” women feel we deserve to have this good man because we have ourselves together. Congratulations on getting through college and graduate school, I know it was a long hard road (especially for me). But we get so caught up in being ‘Miss Independent’ you are so supposed to pay your bills, you are supposed to take care of yourself, you are supposed to stay fly, you are supposed to know how to cook rather you are in a relationship or not. You want a gold star because you are an ‘independent woman??’ Girl Please!!!
We feel we deserve a good man with these same qualities and accomplishments. We find ourselves asking our friends “Girl, I don’t know why he doesn’t want me, I got myself together” or “Girl, I don’t know why he be tripping, I got this, this, and this.” Once again I pose this question to you “And, so what?” That’s it? Your best qualities are the fact you are educated, no kids, ‘independent’, and ‘disease and drama free’. Those are the best qualities you have to offer your mate?? If these qualities are all you have to offer do you really think you are going to find the relationship you want?
Another thing I see us ‘educated’, ‘single’, ‘independent’ women getting caught up in is social status. We think because of our accolades we are better than women who do not hold the same titles. We sometimes wonder “Why is he with her, she got 2 kids by different baby daddies.” I admit, I have been guilty of judging women because they did not have the accolades I possessed. I have talked amongst my peers stating “ugh, why do he want her she has 3 kids” or “Why do he want her, she don’t have any education, ghetto self.” I am guilty and I apologize. I felt entitled as if obtaining my Bachelors and Masters Degree equates to me having a good man. But I realize it does not work like that, for me, for you, for any of us.
For all you ladies seeking mates rethink your elevator speech. Rethink the misconception you are entitled a man because you are independent, educated, no kids, pay your bills, disease and drama free. Spend less time thinking about how you look on paper and more time thinking about the inner you. What qualities and attributes do you have to offer besides “I’m independent?” Are you supportive? Are you compassionate? Are you loving? Are you encouraging? What else do you have to offer besides “Miss Independent” If you think the only reason you DESERVE a good man is because you are ‘independent’ THINK AGAIN.
Opinionated, educated, motivated, and dedicated; Stacy Australia isn't afraid to say what she means and mean what she says. She strives to utilize her writings to make this world a little more enjoyable. Her writings are a little of her, a little of you, and a little of the world. Take this ride with her as she travels the road of the many writers before her. Reflect with her as she talks about love, relationships, family, pop-culture, spirituality, sex, and everything in between. Get to know this 20 something Southern Belle as she sips on her sweat tea mix with lemonade while jamming on her IPOD with a pen and paper on her lap. (www.naturalbloggingsofayoungsocialworker.blogspot.com) (http://twitter.com/StacyAustralia)