As a black person, if someone kills you, you better had been a perfect student, or been nice to all your co-workers, and been obedient in every way possible, you had better not fought for your life, or stolen anything, or had children out of wedlock, or been on welfare, or been a gang member, or drug dealer. You had better not been wearing a hoodie, or Nikes, or baggy pants. If you can, please put on a suit before you get killed. You had better not have braids, if you plan on getting killed. You had better not had gotten into a fight recently. Because having had done those things means that you were worth shit. That you deserved to die. Please try to keep that in mind.
And If you plan on getting raped, you better be white. And if you can’t manage that. You better ask your rapist to be a stranger, someone who you weren’t in a relationship with, or out on a date with, or someone who you had sex with before. And you better not be a sex worker. Because sex workers can't be raped. Just so you know. You better be wearing long black clothes, be married, and be from a wealthy family. Make sure you are a virgin too. It would help also, if you were light skinned. If you had long hair. If you were thin. Dark skin marks you as a ho. As hypersexual. As undeserving of protection, autonomy, and bodily protection. Your rape doesn’t count. It would be good if you would keep this in mind.
And if your boyfriend beats you up. And you’re a black woman. You better have a reputation as a nice, quiet, docile woman. Because surely no one will care, if you talk back to your man, or if you stand up for yourself, or if you’re seen as a loud mouth ghetto bitch. if you plan on being in a violent relationship, make sure you’re educated and that you come from a two parent household. & make sure that this is the first time he’s ever hit you. You can’t forgive him and expect people to care when it happens again. This is a fact.
In short, if you want people to care about your or your life… you better NOT be black. or you better not act black. or you better not look black. you should be able to manage at least one of these. The thing is, when you’re a black person you never get the luxury of being innocent, of being a victim. You are already guilty. Your skin colors says so.
Malaka is an anti-sexual violence activist. She is in the process of starting a community organization, Youth Institute for Anti-Sexual Violence Activism. She was born in Los Angeles but wants to move to San Francisco ASAP. Read more from Malaka at her blog, Hip Hop Cheerleader.
Friday, March 30, 2012
For Harriet is an online community for women of African ancestry. We encourage women, through storytelling and journalism, to engage in candid, revelatory dialogue about the beauty and complexity of Black womanhood. Learn more.